The Buena Vida Podcast

Habit Songs: Insights from BJ Fogg, Ph.D. and Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.

• Lacy Wolff • Season 4 • Episode 1

Share episode

This episode dives into the transformative power of tiny changes, elaborating on the Tiny Habits method developed by Dr. BJ Fogg and his new creative project, Habit Songs for Kids. Listeners gain insight into how simple behavior modifications, music, and emotional understanding can foster lasting change and kindness in children and adults alike in a deep dive discussion with BJ Fogg, Ph.D. and Stephanie Weldy, M.Ed. 

About our guests: 

BJ Fogg, PhD, founded the Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University. In addition to his research, Fogg teaches industry innovators how human behavior really works. He created the Tiny Habits Academy to help people around the world. He lives in Northern California and Maui.

Stephanie Weldy, M.Ed.,  is an expert at the intersection of Behavior Design and employee well-being. She works with BJ Fogg, PhD, to teach industry innovators how to use Behavior Design in the products and services they are building to help people be healthier and happier.


Resources:
Listen to the songs: Songs -- Good Habits for Kids

Watch the videos:  https://www.youtube.com/habitsongsforkids

Links to musical: 

Act 1: https://vimeo.com/bjfogg/act1

Act 2 https://vimeo.com/bjfogg/act2

Act 3 https://vimeo.com/bjfogg/act3 

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

It used to be keep yourself motivated. How do you keep yourself motivated? And I rejected that. I said, no, willpower and motivation doesn't work in the long term. What does is to make sure it's really simple and easy so you can do it every day and be consistent.

Lacy Wolff:

Hi everyone and welcome to the Buena Vida podcast. I'm your host, Lacy Wolff. I'm so excited to be kicking off 2025 with an episode all about behavior change, which is one of my favorite topics, with one of the world's leading experts on this topic. You may have noticed a big change, and that is the name of our podcast. You're still going to be able to find all of the ERS Walk Talk podcast episodes in the Buena Vida library, but, moving forward, the podcast will be found under the name Buena Vida Podcast, which reflects our mission of helping our listeners live a good life.

Lacy Wolff:

I could not be more thrilled about today's guests, dr BJ Fogg and Stephanie Weldy. Bj is the founder of the Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University and he is a world-renowned expert in habit formation. His groundbreaking New York Times bestselling book, tiny Habits how Small Changes that Change Everything, has inspired millions, and his insights have also made a lasting impact on my life as well. Stephanie Weldy has worked closely with BJ for many years and she's also an expert in behavior design and well-being. She's a certified Tiny Habits coach and a certified Well Coaches coach, and she's also a full-time working mom. Together, bj and Stephanie and the Tiny Habits team have recently released their new project Habit Songs for Kids. These are fun, science-backed songs that help kids and parents alike build better habits, reduce stress and foster growth at home.

Lacy Wolff:

Today, we're going to talk about their project, and I'll be also sharing some song clips along the way. So, even if you're not a parent or a grandparent or a teacher, I know you're going to take away some great insights from this conversation, because all of these songs are rooted in the principles of the tiny habits method and are designed to help anyone learn new behaviors in an easy and joyful way. So thanks so much for tuning in. I'm looking forward to sharing this conversation and I hope it helps you get your 2025 started off in a really positive way.

Lacy Wolff:

Without further ado, here's my conversation with BJ and Stephanie.

Lacy Wolff:

Thank you so much for joining me on the Buena Vida podcast. I'm so excited to be with you today. Much for joining me on the Buena Vida podcast. I'm so excited to be with you today. I am looking forward to really hearing about the innovative new work that you're doing. Dr Fogg, I think a lot of people in my population know a lot about your work, but for those who don't, I was thinking before we got started it would be helpful maybe if you just give a brief overview of the behavior model, so that people kind of know what we're talking about when we get into the songs.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Great. A little bit of context. So I'm a behavior change guy. I'm currently situated at the Stanford School of Medicine. They brought me there from other part of Stanford to be the applied practical behavior change guy and, yes, I've done academic work in that area. But I think even more important is I've coached over 60,000 people personally, personally to create habits. That started in 2011. I did week after week after week for eight years. So all that hands-on experience gives you a real sense of what works and what doesn't. The method that I developed is called Tiny Habits, the book Atomic Habits, which many people James Clare took my course in 2013, and that got him interested in habits. You'll see my work in Atomic Habits, but I also published a book called Tiny Habits.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

The Tiny Habits method came to me because I'd created this model called the Fog Behavior Model and I won't go into super details on that because I'd map it out and there's visuals to see. But it is a model that says a behavior happens and habit is a type of behavior. When there's motivation to do that behavior or habit, when there's motivation to do that behavior or habit, when there's ability to do that behavior or habit and there's a prompt, there's something that says do it now, and the implications of the model. There's a curved line on the model and people can. If you want to geek out, go to behaviormodelorg. The easier the behavior, the more likely that people are to do it. Okay, so that was one of the insights. There are others, such, the more motivated you are, the more likely. But it was me looking at my own model in about 2009, 2010, and saying, okay, here's what my model shows If the behavior or habit is super, super easy to do, then you can do it, even if your motivation is not very high. So, with that insight, I started hacking my own behavior, creating these habits that were super small, but I could be very consistent and reliable. At the time, this was a completely maybe not completely, but nobody was talking about making these very small, tiny changes.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Now the landscape has changed. You see it in wellness programs, you see it in James Clear of Works, you see it elsewhere, but that was the path that I went down, even though people thought it was foolish at the time. Now it's. People just assume it's always been that way. It hasn't. It used to be keep yourself motivated. How do you keep yourself motivated? And I rejected that I said no willpower motivation doesn't work in the long term. What does is to make sure it's really simple and easy so you can do it every day and be consistent. So fast forward, coached thousands of people, trained people to be coaches, and we still do that. We have a really great training program so people can be effective at helping other change.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

And then there was a point Cal Stephanie it was probably three years ago. Stephanie works very close with me on pretty much everything. Well, I just felt like kids aren't going to read the Tiny Habits book and it would be so great for kids to understand the concepts of how to change and how to change effectively and well. So I started pursuing the path of creating songs for kids and I found some songwriters to collaborate which were fabulous, found some studio people that were incredible, and so really my contribution on the songs is on the content and making sure the content's accurate and some input on other aspects. But I was working with awesome pros that are very, very good at the music and the production and the talent part of it. And now we have 14 songs in the collection that we call Habit Songs for Kids and I'm really happy with the collection because it conveys some of the key concepts that I think could be really helpful for kids and families to understand to make their lives better, to be healthier and happier.

Lacy Wolff:

Yeah, I listened to all the songs on my last road trip and I think there's a lot of gems in there for all of us, for families, for anybody really. Stephanie, tell me a little bit about how you're using the music and the songs. I know that you also have two children and I don't know if you can talk just a little bit about your experience with working with BJ and how you're using the songs in your own life?

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

Yeah. So for context, bj splits his time between Stanford and industry and I help on primarily the industry side of things. We train innovators who are building a product or service in this systematic approach. We call it the broad umbrella, fog behavior design and the tiny habits method and the fog behavior model. Some of these things sit under that umbrella. Now for my day-to-day life. I'm practicing what I teach in raising two small kids. I have kids age four and six and my alarm goes off at 6, 15 and my feet hit the floor and I do kind of the one prescribed, if you will that use that word habit. It's called the Maui habit and it goes like this After my feet hit the floor, the first thing out of bed I will say it's going to be a great day and I've done this ever since. Well, bj, what year would you say you came up with the Maui habit?

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

oh, probably about 2014 or 15, and then I gave a talk, a TED talk, in Maui on this, so I decided to recognize that. I called it the Maui habit in the TED talk.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

Yeah so you can see BJ reenacting the habit in the TED talk, but I've done this ever since I got home from the hospital with my brand new baby and I heard that baby crying for the first time in the middle of the night, you know, and my feet hit the floor. I'm like it's going to be a great day. I mean, it was probably 2 am, it was probably like not even that much into the night, you know. And so now, you know, when my kids wake me up in the morning or something goes haywire. I have this anchored habit where it's like it's going to be a great day and I we sometimes add this moment like it's going to be a great day somehow. Or now my kids are young and they're getting themselves out of bed, and and we created a song and I think I think maybe I created this when my son was quite young it's like it's going to be a great day, and it goes on and on and you keep saying it. But now we have this official Habit Songs for Kids collection.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

And now, once I get downstairs, I'm the cool mom, I have this little portable speaker that I take with me almost everywhere and I put it in the stroller. So when we walk to school in the morning I hit a song and it's like it's so uplifting, everybody loves it. It's always different, sometimes my kids get to request one, but that's a way you could use it. Maybe you're driving your kids to school, you could use them in the car, maybe you have a sports practice or an after-school activity that you're going to. We just see it as fitting into the daily routine of families and in fact sometimes I'll text BJ because my kids will be sitting there and they'll be like hey, mom, play Wabi Sabi. And I'm like, oh, okay, you know. Or hey, mom, my son was singing the shine song the other day after school and I had played it for him before school. So if that's a song stuck in his head all day, what an awesome melody to be reeling in his in his brain all day.

Lacy Wolff:

Absolutely Shine. I was thinking about and just listening to you talk, bj, about how hard it is to teach adults emotion. I feel like that's the hardest part is getting people to celebrate the win, which is the most important thing in almost every presentation I give. Now. You said emotions create habits, not repetition, not frequency, not fairy dust. It's emotion and it's really difficult, I think, for people to understand that. But if we can teach them younger, hopefully, then we really embed that into their lives.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Yeah, let's listen to a clip of the Shine song and then I'll call out some of the lyrics that I think we wrote all the lyrics for all the songs very, very carefully. But let's give people a sense of this song and then we can dig in a little bit more.

Lacy Wolff:

Perfect.

Singer:

There's a magic potion that can give you a happy emotion. You can embrace it at your command and watch darkness flee and see the light expand. This mighty emotion is divine. Let's name it now.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Let's call it now. Let's call it shine. I really wanted to do a song that would help kids and adults and families understand that there's this emotion that we feel that can help us get through tough things, but it also wires in habits. The feeling of success is what causes a habit to form. It's not repetition. But this feeling, this emotion, did not have a name until I wrote the book Tiny Habits. I talked to my academic colleagues, experts in not only psychology but emotions and words for emotions, and I got in touch and they're like no, we do not have a word that talks about that feeling of success. It's not quite pride, it's not quite satisfaction. And so I decided to name it, and I named it Shine. And that's what this song is doing it's teaching a word for this emotion in the hopes that kids and others will be able to identify and feel that emotion. When you have a word for an emotion, you will be able to identify it better. That's what research shows and you can also talk about it.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

So the verse starts in your heart there's a magic potion that can give you a happy emotion. You can embrace it at your command and watch darkness flee and see the light expand. Now in the next verse, I contrast it with the opposite. You might face a shade monster telling you lies like you're an imposter. Push them out. Throw those lies away. Use your shine superpower to bring light to the day. So this isn't exactly. You know, emotions create habits and celebrate to wire in the habits. It's more about helping people have a word for this emotion that we've all experienced. That really helps us in many ways. Really helps us in many ways. And the collaborator on the song, sarah Senatampo she's awesome and she sings the song and she has kids and it was just a blast to write and do.

Lacy Wolff:

I love that. And Dr Brene Brown talks about how most humans can only identify three emotions happy, sad and angry. Right, I think was what she said in the book Atlas of the Heart. And to be able to provide children just language around emotion I think is so important. And also you're even addressing imposter syndrome, which everyone I think everyone has, so fantastic. So one of the things you also talk quite a bit about with the behavior model is motivation and how motivation is fickle. It's not something that is easy for us always to come by, and I like the song that you have in here about motivation as well, where you talk about motivations like a wave. Can you talk about that one as well?

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

You know, in the collection that was quite different. It's guitar and a woman, who helped write it, sings the song, and what is? It's kind of Beach Boy, kind of Jack Johnson, like you know. She's sitting on the beach talking about a motivation wave. So again, there's this experience we've all had where our motivation goes up and then it comes back down, and it turns out that this has never been named before.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

So I look back in the history of psychology and research on motivation and they had complicated ways to describe it, but there wasn't a simple term, and so years ago I named it, along with a guy named David Sobel who's at Kaiser Permanente. We decided let's call it Motivation Wave. And so that's what this song is about is to help kids and parents and families in general understand that your motivation will go up and down and that's normal. That's not a flaw, it's not a weakness. It's not a weakness. Just like waves go up and down, they're different sizes, and each song in this case again we are teaching a word or a phrase for a psychological construct, in this case motivation wave. But this song also applies it.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

I won't go into the lyrics, but basically it says when your motivation is low, then just kick back and recharge or just do very simple things, okay, and don't feel bad about that. That's how it works. But then when your motivation goes up, then you do the hard things, then you go after you know the big things in your life, and that is so important for, I think, everybody to understand that if your motivation's low don't beat yourself up Either recharge or just do the tiny steps, and then when the motivation's high, that's the time to tackle hard and challenging things. And so it's not like we can always tackle hard or big projects, but certainly when the motivation wave goes up, then take advantage of that.

Lacy Wolff:

You find that most people have sort of negative self-talk when they're not motivated, maybe kind of beating themselves up or and I think that resonates really throughout your music is like be kind to yourself. Can you talk a little bit about that?

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Yeah you're exactly right. The collection Habit Songs for Kids shares like here's new words that describe this construct and some of the techniques for creating habits successfully. But there's a philosophy around tiny habits and, I think, living successfully, and one of those things is to not blame yourself for not always having high levels of motivation and certainly don't feel bad about being imperfect, and one of the songs in the collection is called Wabi Sabi imperfect.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

And one of the songs in the collection is called Wabi Sabi, which is from Japanese Buddhist tradition, which is basically I'm oversimplifying it.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

The song is called Wabi Sabi and I want to do a song on Wabi Sabi because I just love the word Wabi Sabi. But more than that, it's a way to appreciate things that are imperfect and see the beauty and imperfection. Whether it's our own lives, we're imperfect, but you don't see that as ugly or bad. You see the beauty of it. And with others who may not be doing things perfectly in our view, but understand that everyone's doing the best they can that's a key part of the song and then having compassion for that person. So it's a mix of understanding that imperfect things are normal and fine and even beautiful, and then, when the people around us are imperfect, that's our opportunity to have compassion and understand they're doing the best they can. Now Stephanie has talked to me about this song and her boys actually quite a bit. It has a really fun vibe to it and fun wordplay and we have two boys two boys that sing the song and we wanted it to be playful and young and not perfect, and they just do a great job on it.

Singer:

Let's play a clip of that one

Singer:

Now we're dancing in the rain when, before we might pout, wabi Sabi teaches us what we're all about. We're perfectly imperfect, doing the best we can. Wabi Sabi, wabi Sabi, let's give it a hand. Wabi Sabi, wabi Sabi.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

So fun, perfectly imperfect, doing the best we can. Stephanie, I don't think it's that lyric that your boys are resonating with, but certainly it's sinking in. What do you think it is for your boys that they like about this song?

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

about this song. Yeah, I think, as parents helping kids stay curious, experience the world but also learn how to be in the world, it's important to both, as the parent, highlight the wabi-sabi and not get lost in that, and then actually to see it as a positive and then same with the kids. So I'll just give a basic example. But my kids will come home from school and they often are just covered in whatever their day held, you know, and if the parent you're like, oh my goodness, more laundry stains. Or you know, flipped upside down lunch boxes, sand in their shoes, whatever it is. And you know, flipped upside down lunch boxes, fanned in their shoes, whatever it is. And you know I have smaller kids so I'm still responsible for these things almost primarily with my partner. Like a little paint on my son's shirt, it's like, looks like you did some art today, let's talk about it. So it invites the understanding into his day. You know, another thing might be when you're in the car and your kids have something and they break something off of it or they drop it, it's like, oh, it's okay, you know we can three wheels, the car will still go. Or you know, you kind of just look for the positive and not throw shade. I think. I think it's it's about creating shine, even in those moments that are imperfect and, in fact, highlighting them. Like my kid's favorite part of the song BJ is when the teacher's chewing the bubble gum. I think it's that part where it's like chomping the gum and he always says, like chomp, chomp, chomp. You know, and I'm like, yes, I love that because people in your life are going to have habits that kind of annoy you or make you clench up or whatever. So, um, and I'll give you a really practical example, like my holiday cards, I want my kids to be involved and I was teaching my son here's how you put the stamps on and oh, by the way, they're not stickers, you can't just put them anywhere and they're so expensive now. But it's like, you know, letting the crooked stamp, the little bit of wabi-sabi, be like this shows that my kids participated and put the return address things on. And you know, I just I think as a parent you want to embrace that in your kid because it gets them involved in family life. It gets them involved in activities that represent bigger meanings and values in your family and you don't get lost in the perfection trap which gosh.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

I'm a 40 year old woman. I live listening to my friends talk about getting stuck in the perfection trap. They have a plethora and we see this with business people all the time. They have a plethora of ways they can tell themselves you missed the mark, you didn't get it right this time. Don't even go because you don't look as great as you could. They have so few ways of telling themselves you did an awesome job, you delivered a great experience for your kids. Good for you, stephanie, or good for you, lacey. And we really encourage people who are learning how to form habits or learning how to use these songs in their relationships, or really all the methods to create that list. Create that, add to the list of those we call them celebrations that tell yourself you're doing a good job. Because we're very experienced at the negative but less so in the positive self-talk category.

Lacy Wolff:

Yeah, absolutely humans, just in general, I think it's a seven to one, negative to positive. We really need skills to be able to stay positive and to find that good, very much connected to the practice of gratitude for this opportunity.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

So, lacey, here's what was great at that moment, About 15 seconds ago. As soon as you said Wabi Sabi, we got a freeze in the technology, and for me, the Wabi Sabi view of that is like how amazing Stephanie could be one side of the US. I'm just thousands of miles away and Lacey's there, and yet we can talk, and there's this little glitch that reminded us in this moment how amazing it is that we're doing this, and so the glitch is not the problem. The glitch reminds us how wonderful and beautiful it is we can have this conversation.

Lacy Wolff:

I love that. I've noticed also throughout the songs you're talking a lot about core values with just being a good person, and that's not as much like if I read Tiny Habits I think, the habits you can use to build core values and that there's integration there. But these songs are really about being a good person. Can you talk a little bit about what that means and how you integrated these core values?

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Yeah, Thanks for recognizing that. I mean, that wasn't the intention starting out in the song collection, but for me, it's really important to convey positive values, and one of those is kindness. I think kindness matters so much and more and more in our culture. I think we're seeing leaders and influencers who are getting attention because they're not kind, and Stephanie said something about this, oh, a year and a half ago. So, cause we were working on a song about kindness and she's like this is you know for my boys? I want them to grow up. Sorry, Stephanie, I'm putting words in your mouth. I will let you say that and then I'll talk about that, just by being kind. So, Stephanie, when I was sharing this with you and getting some feedback from you, you said something about why this mattered for you.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

Well, yeah, I think, as a raising, I always say I'm raising modern boys, boys who can experience the full gamut of emotion, boys who can be both soft and strong, you know, and I think, especially with what they're seeing in the world, to know you're raising boys that show kindness and respect to people of all colors, all backgrounds, all religions. That's so important to me. I feel like I'm raising someone who shows up and understands really important topics like consent, you know, and then also everyday topics, like I'm in the grocery line and I can help someone right alongside me lift that heavy thing onto the belt or whatever. So I think that was where it was. It's like I want kindness to be a core value, and especially in boys. I think it's even more important maybe now than ever.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

So the main song on this is called Just by being Kind and it's a story song about a boy who says, wow, can I change a life by being kind? And I'm kind of going to give away the story, right, the punchline comes or the aha comes later, but he gives all these examples. He's kind and he practices kindness. The boy singing on this we are so lucky to have him sing on it, he is like a nationally recognized artist at that age and anyway, we're so fortunate he sang this. But the punchline at the end is the life he changed was his own. That's what he recognizes at the end, that yes, he helped people.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Now, what was interesting about the collection Lacey is, in order to help these 14 songs fit together, because they're different topics, different styles, different artists singing these songs, as I wrote, basically a musical, a three-act musical, to pull them all together and the thread that goes through all of them isn't, you know, habits are good and here are the habits to form.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

The thread throughout is kindness. So habits of kindness, and this song, just by being Kind, comes very early, but actually without planning it. Kindness comes up in many of the songs, so it does feel coherent and there is this story musical, basically, that maybe you'll link to and people can listen, and it's just in draft form. That talks about young kids well, young teens figuring out how to be kind and how to do that in a realistic way and bring it in their lives and their community. And right now that it is a tiny title the working title is Tiny, is Mighty a musical story about kindness. So there is kind of this values, and the one that I think surfaces the most is the power and importance of being kind.

Lacy Wolff:

That's amazing and you think about that. You know, helping someone at the grocery store makes your heart happy, and I think also, stephanie, like for you, working with workplace well-being right, we all want to work at a place where people are nice and kind, just generally. It can help our health on so many levels. So, um, yeah, it makes makes a lot of sense to me. Should we play the song clip here? Yeah, let's go ahead and play a clip of just by being kind down, could I make somebody smile if I just listened?

Singer:

for a while, couldn't wait to see it, couldn't wait to find if I could change a life for good just by being kind. Yep, just by being kind.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Here's a side note, lacey we're so lucky to get this boy, young teen, to sing it, and I had some people listen and they all thought it was a woman. His voice is so beautiful and refined and they're like, oh, that's a woman singing. It's like no, that's a very, very talented boy. And so then I went in and said here's how we're going to fix this and it worked is to have him at the beginning saying a teenage boy like me can make a difference in the world before he starts singing. And then there's a spoken part inside to help establish that it's this boy singing it. And then it changes the song, because if you think it's a 25-year-old woman, well, that's one kind of song, but if it is a 13-year-old boy with this beautiful, angelic voice, that's a different song. And that's what the song is. Is that?

Singer:

Even though I'm young, a teenage boy like me can make a difference in the world. This story starts with a dream, and in it I could see a lot of people in need calling out to me, Feeling lonely, feeling lost or just feeling blue. Was there something I could?

Lacy Wolff:

do. I love that. So what is your favorite song, BJ, on the album.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Depends on what mood I'm in. There's a song called Easify. So there's another song that teaches a word and it's very playful and fun, and Easify is like, hey, make things easy to do. But I think if I had to just pick one at the end of the collection there's a song called Twilight, which is a song about ramping down your day and following the rhythm of nature, and there are two versions. There's a version that is orchestrated and violins and so on, and then we decided to do a stripped back version that's just guitar.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

It is a very calming song. It is a song that will bring out emotions of gratitude and peace in me, and so even after working on the song for what? Lots and lots of time it still moves me and there is kind of a mantra in it that goes I am loved, I am safe, I am safe, I am loved. And. And people are guided to put that into a breathing pattern, and I'll use that breathing pattern even when I'm not so the song. What I would love to see happen with this song and we only released it recently is to have families play the song in the evening as a way to wind down, and so if I had to pick one. It's hard, but that would be the one I'd pick right now.

Singer:

When it's my twilight and the day's done, I follow a pattern just like the sun, I slow my body down, breathe deeply in and out.

Lacy Wolff:

Stephanie. How about you? What's your favorite right now? My?

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

answer is probably similar from like depends on the mood, depends on the moment in the day. Similar from like depends on the mood, depends on the moment in the day. I think for me, you know busy working parent just feels like I'm firing all cylinders all the time. I think for me there's another song called I See Awesomeness, and it helps me really orient to the good of what's happening, Even when I'm tidying my house and there's like just you know all this stuff, like where does this even come from? Like I see awesomeness and I brought an example. You know a little show and tell, but I'll be in the bathroom and we have a towel hook and the towel is nicely folded when I leave the bathroom and pulling up the towel now, right, right.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

But then when I come in, my boys will have like crumpled it and like put on the sink and I'm like I see awesomeness, because that means they wash their hands. If they had to dry them, they at least wash them or rinse them with water. Right, and same thing, like with their little shoes. If they're not in the shoe bucket, I mean half the time they are probably half the time. They're'm like I see awesomeness. These are growing, growing little kids and those are the shoes that fit them now, but they won't soon, and that sand won't be on this floor soon. So I see it that way.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

Part of the lyrics are you try your best at every level, right, and it's like the skills you have at four are different than the skills you have at six. So it's like celebrating and really helping myself as a parent feel good about where they are and then also seeing they're going to blossom in new ways. They're going to change and I want them to see me as a source of constant uplift and positivity and listening in their life. And, by the way, we want these same things with our work colleagues. We want them with our partners and peers.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

You can take a conversation with a friend and you can use it to pivot back to yourself, or you can use it to say, wow, tell me more, what was that like or why did that resonate so much with you? So I feel like these are the songs. Yes, they're written for kids because it's a channel to get them into families and kids' lives. But, wow, they're so pertinent in our conversations with our partners or our conversations with our neighbors and so on, and just, there's no threshold for how much good we can create using them, and so a song like that really helps me see it as a pathway to being that kind of person for other people. I hope I'm a role model for my kids.

Lacy Wolff:

I mean, I think that's what so many parents are also aiming for and it's so easy as a parent, especially when they're little, to get caught up and it's frustrating. You just clean this thing and I have this image that pops up every year in my Facebook memories of these little. My kids had little GI Joe men all over the house all the time and, like yarn, attaching them, and I posted this picture to your point. I said I'm going to miss this one day and every year it pops up and I go oh man, and it's a mindset to see awesomeness in these messes and these things that are happening all around us, especially when you've got a lot going on.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Exactly, let me build on those points. I would say 10 of the 14 songs, so 14 of the collection, 10 of them. If, if I, if we'd released an album for adults. People say great these. So there's, there's some that are really oriented toward kids, but at least 10 of them are great for adults and we wrote the lyrics and we brought in the talent. So it would be something we hope that parents like listening to. You know they're not like nursery rhyme songs. I think the lyrics, every word in the songs was carefully chosen. We revised, revised, revised and for most of the songs the music I think is sophisticated. It's not like rap, it's not like you, it's not like techno dance music. But we've had a lot of adults say Tiny Habits for Kids songs. I like these songs. So even if somebody's listening to this and like I don't have kids, there are songs in the collection that will help you live a better life and that's the purpose of doing this.

Lacy Wolff:

I love it and I think I would work out to you.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Got this so yeah, and that one starts. You may be quirky, you may be shy, but you've got everything you need to live a great life. And the singer on that. We are so lucky to have him. Now, some of the songs we have videos for on there on YouTube. Stephanie, what do we have? Five of the songs have a corresponding video.

Lacy Wolff:

Yeah, I will put the links to the videos in the show notes so people can access the YouTube videos. We'll put the links to your website and as well as the Spotify and Apple music playlist so people can get straight to it if they want to listen to the music. I'm so grateful for both of you for spending some time with me to talk about the new music that's come out, and I'm also just so grateful for all the work you do just to make the world a better place. Thank you both so much. Before we close today, I just wanted to ask both of you this is our first episode as the Buena Vida podcast. Buena Vida means a good life, and we're trying to support our state's workforce in building a good life, whatever that means for you. So I'm curious, bj, what does a good life look like for you?

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

So I grew up in a culture and a family that was all about serving others. That was like that was everything, and so I think for me and that still stays with me it's that I am doing things that help people be happier and healthier their physical health, their relationships, their confidence, their ability to achieve all of those things. So, and I do feel like these songs, you know, in addition to my book and other things but these songs are a new and different way for me to bring that into the world, and so when I feel like I'm succeeding on helping other people be happier and healthier, that for me is the good life.

Lacy Wolff:

Absolutely. I love that.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

And, stephanie, what's a good life for you, gosh well, I think more and more about living authentic and fully as yourself, and I look at these tiny humans.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

We raise the diversity all around us and just letting that surface and be celebrated. I think for me, I've always kind of thought my work in the world was about connecting people to resources that better and improve their life. And wow, the best way to do that is to know yourself really well and feel fully accepted and allowed and celebrated to be who you are. So you know, there's probably like well-being things and active in your hobbies and great relationships, but also just accepting yourself where you are today and moving forward with the right methods. And you know we think the most effective ones are the tiny habits method and using these tools where you can make progress in really small ways. That turns out to be transformative. Make progress in really small ways. That turns out to be transformative. So you know, the good life is having great conversations like this, really examining ourselves and then feeling confident we can fully express that and feel supported in the world to do so.

Lacy Wolff:

That's great, and I have no doubt that all the work you're both doing is helping so many people live a good life. So thank you for all you do and, again, just thank you so much for spending some time with me. I look forward to getting this episode out to our listeners.

BJ Fogg, Ph.D. :

Lacey, thank you so much for inviting us.

Stephanie Weldy M.Ed.:

Yes, thank you so much, lacey, and here's to Buena Vida for all the listeners, all right.

Lacy Wolff:

Thank you so much for joining us for this episode of the Buena Vida podcast. I hope you enjoyed listening to Dr Fogg and Stephanie Weldy talk about habit songs for kids and how the tiny habits method can help create lasting positive change in our lives. Be sure to check out our show notes for links to all the information shared in today's episode, including resources from BJ and Stephanie, and subscribe to the podcast if you haven't already. Coming up, in February, we'll be hosting Dr Jane Morgan. She is a cardiologist and is the VP for medical affairs at Hello Heart. She specializes in women's health and cardiovascular research and you will not want to miss that conversation.

Lacy Wolff:

As we move to a once a month schedule for 2025, I'll continue to bring you impactful interviews and insights to support you living your good life. Thanks again for tuning in. Until next time, take care and remember that small changes really can change everything. And as you move into 2025, I'm going to leave you with one more clip from the Habit Songs for Kids album. Whatever you're working on, stay positive, stay hopeful and remember you've got this. Take care everyone. You got this. You're better every day, even when it seems that everything is going wrong. Thank you.